Sunday, June 24, 2007

Evil vs good, is kindness just as hard to find in the real world?

Last night could be classified as a living night in hell. I have never lost control of my body like that before. I went through 5 pairs of underwear and three pajama outfits. I had the nurse change the sheets 3 times. That was in addition to the 2 times mom and I had changed them.
Earlier in the night mom and I went for a stroll outside to hunt for dinner and to get some fresh air. Well on the way back to the hospital I noticed that I probably pushed myself to far. When we got back to the hospital I had started the access to my GI tube with Peg Lyte, four litres of it.So we started eating soup and bubble tea. Well ,the dam broke and there was no way of holding it back. I stoped counting how many trips I had made to the bathroom. And worst yet how many trips I didn't make to the bathroom. I slept naked from the bottom down, thats why there are so many more clothes to wash, between all the wires and the extreme pain, I couldn't make it fast enough to the toilet. I felt so helpless.
I remember last night begging a nurse( gotta find out this witches name) for morphine by IV, because the pill wasn't doing anything fast enough.She continued to talk to me like a little child and reminded me about addiction, blah, blah, blah. I told her to be quiet ad that I am a 35 year old woman that is able to make informed decisions for myelf, and addiction was not an issue right now, get me the damm drugs. Funny how I always get a new nurse after one of these episodes with my temper. Those tempers usually come with a threat about calling the head of the nursing staff . I absolutely hate nurses that know how to read doctors orders, but throw a fit with the patients when it comes time to giving them the narcotics. This is to tiring, the battle between good nurse and bad nurse. Unfortunetly there are more bad than good in this hospital.
I hope things heal up soon so I can go home to enjoy my family.My stomac, gut hurts so very bad today I can hadly walk, so my plans are to rest.Sleep and after putting another 4 litres into my GI tube....pooping will be on thr
Let's hope today goes better,
Kimberly and a visiting momma Barb.